They have said it. I have read it. And I even advice it to friends and colleagues. When you are experiencing something that can be associated to midlife crisis, don’t make decisions in haste because there is a good chance that it is only a temporary need. Well, I didn’t take my own word, nor what friends and family say, and not even the psych books I read. I saw the puppy in the morning, by lunchtime I have decided I’m going to adopt it, and before the day ended I got a pet dog.
I have never even fed, nor walk, nor pat a dog in my life before. Actually, I have never taken interest on pets of any sort.I am an INTP in Myers-Briggs, a 5 in the Enneagram and consistently scores very low in any nurturance test. To get me involved in anything, present it to me as a problem. Theoretically, in crisis or not, I shouldn’t have pets for they will just become an object of investigation. They will become guinea pigs and live a life of another specie. Dogs need to be fed, bathed, cleaned, vaccinated, potty-trained and, learn basic skills like responding to his name, sit and stay commands. While I believe I am a good teacher, this does not include teaching dogs. I am a strong advocate of constructivist philosophy of teaching while teaching dogs call for the exact opposite of this philosophy. I believe humans construct their own knowledge through negotiation. Dogs don’t learn that way. They respond to reward and punishment alone. For Boogie boy sakes, I learned to bend my world view and do routines to make him learn all these with the help of dog sites in the net. Within months I was a dog consultant in our office and an authority on dog diets.
Boogie’s a big boy now. While I no longer feel the need to take care of dogs, turtles, rabbits, and birds (yes, there were others I want) or be obsessed in reviving dying plants and in making them bloom with flowers (yes, this was part of it all), I’m surprised I couldn’t just detached myself from those I took care of. I gave myself two years for this folly and then I thought I’ll get my time and attention back to myself. But alas, I couldn’t go back. Detachment I guess is only a lot easier when you are young. Strangely though, I feel a little bit wiser now in life than before Boogie came to my life, considering we never really had any philosophical conversation, just morning and evening walks. Most of the times we just sit side by side after a days work. There is no need for words to let each other know how our day went, just a few woofs of endearments.
Ah, friendship…the best ones are always built by rituals of patient waiting, periodic silence, and lingering presence.